How Could You Hate This Face?

I mean seriously, how? I could understand wanting to assault it with kisses. I could understand wanting to force chocolates or diamond studded tiaras. But hate?

Actually, it turns out to be easier than you might think to hate Miss Michigan, now Miss USA and contender for Miss Universe, Rima Fakih. All you have to be is on the extreme right wing (of the “Real America”, mind you, not the extreme right of the Muslim diaspora. They hate her too probably, but for different reasons), a paranoid delusional, and someone who makes pissing on the accomplishments of others a hobby.

From AlterNet comes this story of how miss Fakih, a Lebanese American, now has to contend with probably the first original criticism of beauty pageant winners in years, unless you count that Carrie Prejean nonsense. Sure, she’s under fire for the same old things: being a “poor role model” for having participated in an amateur pole dancing contest , participating in a beauty contest at all since they’re so fundamentally oppressive (google that one your damn self, because the attacks are LEGION), so on, all the usual suspects.

But you saw this coming didn’t you? Miss Fakih, proud of her win (rightly), and eager to use her newfound prominence to advocate for peace between cultures, to stand as a bridge linking East and West… now has to contend with maniacs trying to accuse her of actually being part of a Hezbollah plot to undermine America.

I’m so lucky I’m ugly as sin. Think what you want about pageants, strippers, or so on, but it’s this kind of WTF that almost makes me wish the right wing’s paranoid fantasies were right about just one thing: The detention camps set up just to reeducate them. In my version though, I’d be happy to just cede them Utah, build a nice fence (they make good neighbors, remember), and let ’em sort it out. Any tries to hop over that fence though, my monkeys are trained to fling poo at them.

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