So Ready

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How Could You Hate This Face?

I mean seriously, how? I could understand wanting to assault it with kisses. I could understand wanting to force chocolates or diamond studded tiaras. But hate?

Actually, it turns out to be easier than you might think to hate Miss Michigan, now Miss USA and contender for Miss Universe, Rima Fakih. All you have to be is on the extreme right wing (of the “Real America”, mind you, not the extreme right of the Muslim diaspora. They hate her too probably, but for different reasons), a paranoid delusional, and someone who makes pissing on the accomplishments of others a hobby.

From AlterNet comes this story of how miss Fakih, a Lebanese American, now has to contend with probably the first original criticism of beauty pageant winners in years, unless you count that Carrie Prejean nonsense. Sure, she’s under fire for the same old things: being a “poor role model” for having participated in an amateur pole dancing contest , participating in a beauty contest at all since they’re so fundamentally oppressive (google that one your damn self, because the attacks are LEGION), so on, all the usual suspects.

But you saw this coming didn’t you? Miss Fakih, proud of her win (rightly), and eager to use her newfound prominence to advocate for peace between cultures, to stand as a bridge linking East and West… now has to contend with maniacs trying to accuse her of actually being part of a Hezbollah plot to undermine America.

I’m so lucky I’m ugly as sin. Think what you want about pageants, strippers, or so on, but it’s this kind of WTF that almost makes me wish the right wing’s paranoid fantasies were right about just one thing: The detention camps set up just to reeducate them. In my version though, I’d be happy to just cede them Utah, build a nice fence (they make good neighbors, remember), and let ’em sort it out. Any tries to hop over that fence though, my monkeys are trained to fling poo at them.

Monday is International Day Against Homophobia (IDAHO)

To mark this year’s International Day Against Homophobia (IDAHO), which is officially Monday, May 17, at least 6 US cities as well as other cities worldwide  will celebrate with the “Great Global Kiss-In” this weekend.  IDAHO wants you to participate and send them a video. Find out more here:

Gorilla Glasses keep things on the down low

What’s that? No, I’m not looking at you. Nope, I’m very interested in something that is above and slightly to the left of me…

In the wake of a recent gorilla attack, The Rotterdam Zoo developed some crafty specs made of cardboard so that zoo visitors can cruise all the gorillas they want without tipping the creatures off to their interest. Gorillas become very agitated if you’re too forward, you see.  But I’m thinking these shades have lots of potential for other sorts of monkey business as well… Read more

Adventures in cooking

Tired of the same old thing for dinner? Want to start cooking with some new ingredients? Ever considered semen? Yes, semen! Well, if you have, here’s the cookbook for you! According to the author, “Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants.”  Now you will never be hungry again!

Inspired

Going to be one of those days apparently. Twice in a row I’m struck speechless by human creativity. This time not for the lolfactor, but rather for the staggering beauty of the idea.

"Beg pardon, ladies, just trying to... why yes I AM happy to see you but... oh bugger"

Down at the MoMA in NYC (up at the MoMA? They are north of us after all…), those who want a real experience of performance art, an often confusing and maligned art form, can check out the new retrospective exhibition of Marina Abramovic and her former partner Ulay’s work.

Which is why this gentlemen is trying to walk between two nude women posed in a narrow corridor, of course.

Abramovic has a long career of challenging perspectives and assumptions with her work. This installation has some of her more famous works being recreated by models and for those that can’t be recreated, they have video installations. The collaboration that brought to an end her working relationship with Ulay is one of these, where you can see both of them walking the entire length of the Great Wall of China, a project that took them three months until they met in the middle.

And as an extra piece of astonishing beauty and “generosity” in the curator’s words, the artist herself sits silently at the exhibit. Visitors may sit across from her in silence and “complete” the piece.

No jokes here. This just bowls me over with its brilliance.

Does Abstinence Only Education WorK?

Conservatives are all atwitter now that there is a study by Jemmot and Jemmot that shows that abstinence only education reduces sexual activity in teens. Perhaps however, the conservatives failed to notice that one third of the 12 and 13 year old students in the study were already sexually active. Perhaps they haven’t read a study done at Iowa State that shows that 1 in 4 low income children have their first sexual intercourse by age 12. The Jemmot and Jemmot study also teaches abstinence without guilt and misinformation. Said Loretta Jemmot, co-author of the study, “Our program didn’t focus on the moralistic issue of waiting until marriage. It focused on waiting until you’re responsible to be able to handle the consequences of sex.” Read more.

Odd combination of sexuality and spirituality

Being a spiritual person does not mean that you cannot be a sexual person,  but this combination….well, it’s just a little odd. And to proclaim it on a sign, well that just defies good taste and seems somewhat declasse.

“When does everybody start masturbating?”

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Planned Parenthood schools Tim Tebow

Trust women. How simple is that? Beautifully done, Planned Parenthood. 

Side note: What do people talk about leading up to the Super Bowl? Commercials. What do they talk about leading up to the Rugby World Cup? Fuckin’ Rugby. I rest my case.